Jack’s Freaking Awesome Book, Take 2

I asked Debbie over today to help me figure out how this book works. She’s used to taking a bit of punishment (HAR HAR) and well, to be honest, better her than me.

We figured out some things pretty quickly.

• The Book uses resources immediately available.

A shallow cut on Debbie’s arm led to it recommending a bandage.  A stab wound (don’t worry, it was just muscle tissue on her non-dominant arm) and it recommended using the next-door neighbor’s sewing kit.  That might explain the whole not-cooling-down-burns thing whatsisface mentioned last time I posted.

• You have to be exact.

Debbie apparently has a “bladder” infection (whatever you whore, it’s totally the herp) but when we asked The Book to diagnose her, it stayed blank.  It was still blank when I asked it to treat a bladder infection.  Then Debbie took it and whispered something at it.  When she read whatever it told her to do, her face turned bright red.  Then she mumbled something about having to go grocery shopping and left.

Grocery shopping for HERPES MEDICATION I BET!  Anyway, she came back an hour or so later and we kept going.

• The Book doesn’t take into account things like calling 911.

Debbie’s going to be in the hospital for the next couple of days, FYI.  “Suicide watch.”  (I guess she has a history?  That explains why she was so eager to try cutting herself.  I never would have guessed.)